Saturday, December 20, 2014

Our Journey Part I

I would love to be able to eloquently describe in vivid details the emotions we have experienced the last two years. I would love to articulate the problems we faced but I cant. Not because I don’t want to disclose that information, but because it is so unexplained, that we just cant find a way to express it to you. However, we want you to know, so here is our best attempt to catch you up to date.

I had gone on the field knowing that Spiritual Warfare was inevitable. We were marching into an area held in bondage by witchcraft and spiritual worship. However, I had no idea what it would look like, and it came in a way that held me captive by confusion. It did not come in the form of temptation like I had imagined it would. It didn’t come as a blazing fire labeled ‘warfare’. It came subtly and left me so confused that I thought I was crazy. I was beat down and didn’t even know why or how to even begin to pinpoint the cause. I decided to bury these fears deep and to ignore them. Little did I know they would all come flowing out in the fall of 2013.

That November, we had a team meeting in Lokichoggio, Kenya (where we lived). This meant that all our friends and co workers in S.Sudan and surrounding countries would gather together for a time of prayer, fellowship and updates. We had been looking forward to it. During this meeting, we realized that each one of us was tired and worn. It was during this meeting that I felt the need to verbalize for the first time things that had been holding me in confusion and fear. Our member care was there, so we sat down on the last evening and out poured all these mysterious issues I had been dealing with. Jonathan was hearing many of them for the first time. Our sweet member care, who are our dear friends, decided it would be best to remove us from the area for a short time and dig deeper into the issue. They did not have answers and were too confused themselves at what was taking place. They suggested we just take a month in Nairobi to try and figure out what was going on. The meeting ended and everyone returned to their homes.  We waited in
Lokichogio for further instructions. On top of everything, we were both in deep depression, that neither one of us could lift the other up. The only way we got any relief from this heavy weight was to go into the villages and do ministry, so we did.

A few days later, on my birthday, we got a call. It had been a really tough day and Jonathan had heated up kettles of water and filled the bath for me to have a hot bath on my birthday. I was trying to relax, but then I heard Jonathan on the phone and his voice sounded bothered. He had just received a phone call and we were being sent to the States for a month. You would think joy would overcome us, but we had been looking forward to Christmas with our Turkana friends for months. We had so many wonderful plans. We could not leave, not now. We tried to make our case that we would be fine, just let us get through Christmas and then we would take care of ourselves.  But, thank the Lord that those making the decision were not us, rookies, but Godly men who had years of experience and knew red flags when they saw them.

Before we knew it, we were landing in Charlotte, NC. We told no one of our homecoming and stayed our first night in the states in a hotel near our families. The next day would bring tears of joy as we surprised our family and received overdue hugs. However, little did we know the following year would bring heartache we could never imagine as we journeyed on the road for answers.

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